I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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