11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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