Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
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