Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
You have to summon your inner elephant
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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