i don't like sucking hair
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
