it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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