Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
