Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
