Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
