Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
