I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
