Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
