I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
The beers last night were like the tears from god
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
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