Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Will exercising make me less horny?
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
