It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
