"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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