Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
