real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
