i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Barsexuality is the new black.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
