I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
