worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize