He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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