Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I want you more than these girls want KFC
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize
