please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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