Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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