its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Can I color on your dick again?
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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