have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
My day in three words: secret purse cake
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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