We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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