Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
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