And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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