Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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