No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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