we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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