Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
