I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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