I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
