Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
