Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
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