Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
