so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize