shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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