We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
