Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
