dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
