I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
