um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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