It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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