It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
