shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
