Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
high people should be assigned attendants
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
